Audition Anxiety

Student Fiction

“Sadie! You have to!” Josie, my best friend, exclaims.

“Josie, I already told you that I’m not going to.” I shove my books into my locker.

“But you have an amazing voice and you’d be a fantastic Wendy!” Josie tells me.

She’s been trying to get me to try out for our school’s production of Peter Pan. Auditions are tomorrow, on Friday.

“Josie!” I say, “NO!” I throw my homework into my backpack.

“Come on!” She pulls on my arm but I shake her off.

“I don’t want to,” I complain as we walk out of school, but Josie’s not giving up.

She pesters me about it the whole walk to my house. As we walk into the kitchen, my mom welcomes us as she’s standing at the stove making dinner.

Josie sidles up to her and asks, “Mrs. Houten, shouldn’t Sadie try out for Peter Pan?”

My mom wipes her hands on a towel and looks at us. I shake my head but she says, “Sadie, you should! That’d be a great experience!”

“Not you too!” I gasp, collapsing onto a chair.

“Come on!” Josie sits next to me. “Pleeeeessssseeeee?” I look over at her and she’s giving me the puppy eyes.

“Honey, you should. You have an amazing voice!” My mom goes back to her cooking.

Josie smiles. “That’s what I said!”

“Since when were you on Josie’s side?” I complain to my mom.

“Sadie! Please? Just do it for me! I’ll try out with you!” Josie offers.

“How many time do I have to say it?” I exclaim. “NO!”

Just then the doorbell rings. It’s Mrs. Freeman, Josie’s mom. Since my mom answered the door, Josie has a few minutes before she has to go because our moms will chat. Josie hands me a packet of papers and tells me to think about right before she leaves.

After dinner, I go upstairs and take a shower. As I’m walking back into my room, towel wrapped around me, I see the papers Josie handed to me on my desk. It’s the information and audition packet for Peter Pan. I quickly pull on my pajamas and then I sit down at my desk to read the packet. After I read the whole packet from cover to cover, I go back and stare at the audition form. With a shaky hand I fill it in.

 

Name: Sadie Houten

Age: 14

Grade: Freshman

Height: 5’3”

Do you have any after school conflicts that would enable you to miss any rehearsal? If so, date/time?

No

Do you have any experience playing an instrument? If so, what instrument?

I play the saxaphone in our school band.

Do you have any previous theatre experience? If so, what?

No

Do you have any previous singing/dancing experience? If so, what?

No

If not selected as a lead role, are you interested in a small non-speaking role/chorus role?

Why not?

After filling in all the questions and general information, it asks me what role I’d like to try out for. I stare at the typed sentence for five minutes.

Wendy? I think. No, I’d never be cast as the lead. How about Tiger Lily? She doesn’t have any lines or solos does she? Or how about Mrs. Darling, the kids’ mom? She has a very small role.

I end up writing that I don’t care about what role I get because I don’t. I’m only auditioning for this show for Josie. After filling out the form I search the Internet for a monologue and for a song to sing. After a half hour of searching, I choose a monologue from Cinderella. The song I choose to sing is “Defying Gravity” from Wicked. I set out my printed copy of the monologue and a printed copy of “Defying Gravity” and go to bed.

The next afternoon, after sending a quick text to my mom telling her that I’m auditioning, I make my way to the school’s auditorium. I haven’t told anybody that I’m auditioning, not even Josie. I walk down to the front few rows where everybody is seated and quickly add my name to the audition order list. I get to go last, and if I’m lucky, nobody will stick around to hear me audition. After hearing a few people, I can tell that I’m going to have a lot of competition. One of the girls in my class, Gina, starts her song and it sounds amazing. She hits all the right notes and I suddenly get really nervous for my audition. Will I mess up? What if I mess up my lyrics? A few hours later, I have heard at least thirty other people sing their songs and recite their monologues and now it’s my turn.

“Audition form?” The director asks me and I hand her my form and headshot with a shaky hand.

“Can I do my monologue first?” I asks as I go up to the stage.

“You can audition however you want,” the director tells me and I begin my monologue.

After my monologue, I hand a copy of “Defying Gravity” to the pianist and she begins the opening chords while my heart beats really fast in my chest. After I start to sing, I don’t even look at my lyrics because I’ve sung the song so many times and my eyes drift closed. I forget that I’m standing on a stage, I’m in my bedroom, singing along to my iPod. I hold the final note and open my eyes to a ton of applause. Everybody who auditioned is standing in rows of chairs and applauding. I look to the music director and she is applauding and the director looks pleased.

“Good job,” she looks at my sheet, “Sadie. You can have a seat.” I make my way back to my seat. “Thank you to everybody who has auditioned. We will post a list of the cast of Peter Pan on Monday. Thank you and have a good night,” The director finishes and I grab my stuff. I feel somebody poke my arm and I turn to see Josie.

“I didn’t see you in there and then there you were. Singing Wicked!” She exclaims to me.

“I had a change of heart last night,” I explain. “Hey, you did a great job!”

“I’ll be lucky if I get a fairy. You’ll be Wendy, for sure!” She says.

I shake my head, “Doubt it. Gina did so much better than me and she’s had so much more practice.”

“Sadie, Gina is great, but you’re fantastic!” Josie jostles my shoulder.

 

***

 

Monday morning I walk into school and see a ton of students crowded around the announcements board.

“Sadie! Come look!” Josie calls me over. I make my way to the bulletin board and scan the list to find my name.

 

Tinkerbell ………………….. Sadie Houten

Tiger Lily/Mrs. Darling ………………….. Josie Freeman

 

“I’m Tinkerbell?” I ask.

I get a response from four different people all of them affirmative.

“I’m Tinkerbell!” I exclaim. “Josie, I’m Tink and you’re Tiger Lily!”

“Yes, we are!” Josie cheers back.

I smile to myself. I’m Tink! Yay me!

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